What is the assertiveness? Apparently everyone knows, but when you look at the behavior of people, check that does not really know, or in most cases they confuse it with aggressiveness.
To know exactly what is the assertive communication, we must refer to the concept of public and private chat conversation. We all have this double talk. The private is what we think and feel, while the public is what we decided to express and say. There are people that filter much their thoughts and feelings (private conversation) and actually express something very different (public conversation). It is what is called the passive communication.
Contra, there are people who do not filter anything or very little you think, and actually most of the time, your private conversation is exactly like the public. Many think that these people are sincere, honest and trustworthy. This is the big mistake. This profile is the aggressive, and failure to filter your communications, generates many conflicts, stress, Insulation deterioration and relationships. The problem is that this type of profile “cree” erroneously that such behavior is assertive. Even struts that “is that we must be honest…” the “Do not say what you think is hypocritical or cynical”. These beliefs will bring huge problems and sometimes they close the doors to your career.
So there are many conflicts in companies, not well understood because the keys effective communication. An assertive not passive, because he says what he thinks and feels. Nor is aggressive because it filters your communication in order to avoid rejection and conflicts resulting from the aggressive. The filters used are as follows assertive communicator:
– Try to find the time communication right to issue.
– Try to find the best place to communicate.
– Try to find the best frame of mind to communicate.
If you use these three filters, our communication will be more effective and be much more influential. It is most appropriate to say something awkward to a coworker in front of five people in the company or in the hallway, or when I'm upset or stressed for other reasons. All that goes against us, and will not achieve the desired results.
Therefore, if you want to be a master of effective communication, I assertive. Be sure to say what you think and feel ever, but uses 3 assertiveness filters. Its 3 nets for not falling into the void and to not increase your daily problems, which are already quite.
Managing Partner Execoach